“I don’t love them anymore.” Over my years ministering to
families, I have heard those words come from husbands and wives as they have
chosen to leave a marriage, often after many years together. Adultery? No.
Physical or emotional abuse? No. “I just don’t love ‘em anymore.” A decision
leads to a change of heart that fractures a family.
Love as a decision? Our culture struggles with that concept.
Reducing love to an emotional or physical response is a common attribute in pop
culture from music, movies, and literature. Some form of commitment may result
from this euphoric feeling, but it is hardly a firm foundation for an enduring relationship.
There is a principle in Scripture that addresses this decision/feeling
challenge. “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” The key is
what comes first.
“I don’t love ‘em anymore.” Why did the heart wander?
Treasure. When one decides to treasure something, an amazing transformation
occurs in their heart. The key to a commitment that will stand in the midst of
trouble: treasure. I don’t believe that one can “fall out of love.” One stops
seeing another as a treasure and the heart pursues another treasure. The secret
to commitment is what you choose to treasure.
This principle extends well beyond a marriage. Forgiveness
begins with a decision. My heart rarely ever wants to forgive. But without that
decision, without that treasure, my heart will not let it go. How can you apply
the treasure principle?
Dedicated to the one I treasure and love with all my heart.
I love you, Karen!
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