No More Mr. Nice Guy

I resolve to no longer be nice. Now before you begin avoiding me, I would appreciate you hearing me out. I think of the ways that we use the word “nice” to our children. And yes, I have used that anemic word with my own children, but just what noble task am I calling them to pursue? We ask them to “play nice,” but wouldn’t playing nice mean I would let the other win; “be nice,” but wouldn’t being nice limit their passion to stand against injustice. There is something missing within this word. Is there verbiage in our lexicon that we can use with our children to inspire them to a noble character?

The Fruit of the Spirit recorded in Scripture provides us with just such vocabulary. “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.” (Galatians 5:22-23) Since these virtues are listed under the singular heading of fruit, I believe the power in these virtues comes from their collective use as well as their individual definitions. Consider the depth of inspiring our children to foster the best in others – love. Delighting in the Lord in the midst of any circumstances – joy and peace. Even kindness, some might say that this seems too much like nice. However, kindness is rooted in the words, kin or kindred; challenging us to consider others like part of our family.

So when your child is leaving to go to school or to a friend’s house, don’t limit their influence on the world around them by asking them to “be nice.” Inspire them to noble virtues by demanding much more of them. My wife and I chose terms like “Be an example” or “Be a blessing, not a burden” as our farewell words as our boys bounded off to their next adventure. As you send them out, also consider how you pray for them. Bob Hostetler has developed a strategy to intentionally pray for Biblical qualities for our children: 31 Biblical Virtues to Pray forOur Kids. Consider the power of praying that each of these virtues would be impressed on the hearts of our children. No more Mr. Nice Guy . . . there is so much more!

To see Bob Hostetler’s 31Biblical Virtues to Pray for Our Kids, click on this link.

I Love a Good Story!!

History teachers love stories. I am no exception. In the midst of my love affair with history, I understand the challenges that come with familiar stories. The stories begin to form into myth, and then the symbolism overwhelms the core of the story. Myths can be powerful, yet misunderstood. Webster defines myth as “a usually traditional story of ostensibly historical events that serves to unfold part of the worldview of a people or explain a practice, belief, or natural phenomenon.” Based on this definition, I am by no means anti-myth. The Christmas story serves as an example of this type of myth: a historical event that has been told in imaginative ways to illustrate its importance. Songs like the “Little Drummer Boy” speak of the importance of the birth of Christ utilizing non-historical characters; hence the misunderstandings that can occur as a result of a myth.

While some songs of Christmas may perpetuate myth, others explore the depths of Truth revealed in the Christmas story, which is the story of our redemption. Often you have to get past the familiar first verse of a Christmas carol to experience the weight of the Truth. Essential to our redemption is the fact of the incarnation. The Creator of the universe wrapped Himself in human flesh, flesh that would be torn by the hands of His creation with the purpose of redeeming man from the result of our sin. “There's no more devastating message than what the cross says about you. There's no more comforting promise than what the cross offers you.” (Paul David Tripp) The hope of the Christmas story is the cross and what Christ purchased on our behalf on that cross. Tripp continues, “If righteousness were in your grasp, there would be no need for the baby in Bethlehem, the cross on Calvary, or the empty tomb.” Listen to the Truth revealed in our songs of the Christmas story:

O Come, O Come, Emmanuel

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free

Thine own from Satan's tyranny

From depths of Hell Thy people save

And give them victory o'er the grave

Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel

Shall come to thee, O Israel.

Lo, How a Rose E'er Blooming

This Flower, whose fragrance tender with sweetness fills the air,

Dispels with glorious splendor the darkness everywhere;

True Man, yet very God, from sin and death He saves us,

And lightens every load.

Joy to the World

No more let sins and sorrows grow,

Nor thorns infest the ground;

He comes to make His blessings flow

Far as the curse is found,

Far as the curse is found,

Far as, far as, the curse is found.

Hark the Herald Angels Sing

Hail the heav'n-born Prince of Peace!

Hail the Son of Righteousness!

Light and life to all He brings

Ris'n with healing in His wings

Mild He lays His glory by

Born that man no more may die

Born to raise the sons of earth

Born to give them second birth

Hark! The herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!"

Thank you, Lord! I love a good story!!

“[Jesus] who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”

Philippians 2:6-11

Newtown's Weeping

Entering the last week of school before Christmas Break, I find myself drawn to a scene in the Christmas story that we skip in most of our pageants. “A voice was heard in Ramah, Lamentation, weeping, and great mourning, Rachel weeping for her children, Refusing to be comforted, because they are no more.” This scene has been played out on the news all weekend. The scene has dominated our airways, conversation, and prayers. In the midst of this scene stands our children, listening to our conversations and trying to make sense of our torment. Knowing that each child is different with varying levels of sensitivity, I would like to offer some thoughts concerning talking with your child about tragic events.

The Bible reminds us to “speak the Truth in love.” This is clearly an important application of this verse. Younger children may not have heard, but don’t assume that they haven’t. Conversations, even among young classmates, can spread scary misinformation. Ask simple questions to determine what your child has heard and understands concerning the tragedy. Make time to listen and answer questions with age-appropriate information (Talking to Children About Violence: Tips for Parents and Teachers). The questions may come when we least expect it, but don’t miss the opportunity to comfort your child in that unexpected conversation. This will require patience on your part. Your love being expressed through listening and patience will provide great reassurance as your child faces the brokenness of this world. I have attached two resources that will be of assistance as you minister to the heart of your child.

“Our children are not immune to the darkness and brokenness of our world. We may think that if we ignore this incident, our kids won’t know about it or feel the impact. Nothing could be further from the truth! Our kids need parents and teachers—those who have influence in their lives—to be emotionally present and invested, especially in moments like these.” Dr. Tim Clinton, American Association of Christian Counselors

• Six "Ts" for Helping Kids Through Trauma
• http://www.nasponline.org/resources/crisis_safety/talkingviolence.pdf

We are young . . . and hopeless.

Throughout this past year, there has been a song that resonated on the radio, TV, iPods, and YouTube. Some even suggested that this song become the official anthem of the young people gathered to compete at the 2012 London Olympics. The chorus fits the mood of such an international event:

Tonight

We are young

So let’s set the world on fire

We can burn brighter than the sun

I was already familiar with the uplifting chorus when I finally heard the entire song while on a road trip with my son. Fun.’s We are Young, rather than motivating a generation toward anything inspiring, describes an apathetic combination of hedonism and hopelessness. The song begins with drug use in a bathroom and concludes with being so intoxicated that someone has to be carried home. Such a theme is hardly unusual in popular music. The question I pondered is whether this theme of emptiness is reflecting or driving culture. I am convinced it is both. Scottish politician Andrew Fletcher once noted, “If a man were permitted to write the ballads of a nation, he need not care who writes its laws.”

Fun. continues to explore hopelessness in another anthem-like ballad, Some Nights. Even when gazing at the face of an infant, their hopelessness cannot be shaken.

My heart is breaking for my sister and the con that she called "love"

When I look into my nephew's eyes...

Man, you wouldn't believe the most amazing things that can come from...

Some terrible lie . . .

When I look into eyes of the young people I have been called to serve in Christian education, I see hope. Hope because I see the image of our Creator stamped on each student. Equipped with the Truth of the Gospel, Christian education is preparing young people to engage the growing culture of hopelessness. The education that we provide must be infused with a Biblical worldview in every discipline from science to art, praying that these students will write the next “ballad of a nation.”

“Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.” I Timothy 4:12

Check out the resources at AXIS: Apathy to Action. Axis creatively educates hearts by questioning assumptions, interpreting media, and equipping communities to move from apathy to compassionate action.